Why Older Women Rarely Report Abuse

Older women are often more economically vulnerable than younger women, and may fear poverty, homelessness, or loss of health care benefits if they report abusive behavior by a spouse or family member. Some older abused women have no formal education or economic resources of their own.

If an older woman is frail or dependent on others to provide physical care, she may fear being placed in a nursing home if she reports abuse or neglect.

The majority of older women who suffer from spousal abuse are generally in good health but still fear if they report the abuse they will lose their livelihood and independence.

Even more than younger women, older women have been socialized to minimize their own identity, needs, and desires in order to meet their family’s needs. They believe that they should not “air our dirty laundry in public."

Verizon Campaign Against Elder Abuse

Older women are less likely to seek social and psychological services because many of them were brought up to believe that such help is a sign of weakness and failure.

Women abused by a spouse may not be willing to view separation or divorce as options because of the stigma (only 3% of all elders are divorced) or an inability to envision life without a long-term spouse.

Images perpetrated by the media of battered women as younger women with children may leave society and older women with the impression that domestic violence doesn’t occur in mid or later life.

Many older women hold extremely traditional/conservative religious beliefs and may believe that it is wrong to leave or report a spouse regardless of the treatment she is receiving from him: “Until death do us part.”

Some adult children will be supportive of their mothers and help them in any way they can. Others create barriers by encouraging women to stay, believing that if she leaves the children may need to take responsibility for their abusive father. Some side with batterers, believing their mother’s role is to keep the family together: denial in whatever form is extremely powerful.

Source: Prevent Elder Abuse
Office to Prevent Domestic Violence, New York State