Relationship Accounts

How are you doing in relationships with your friends, your siblings, your parents or guardians, your teachers? Your relationship or emotional bank account represents the quality of the relationship you have with others. It’s kind of like a bank account in that you can make ‘deposits’ (earn chips) or you can make ‘withdrawals’ (lose chips). You make deposits by being kind, apologizing, keeping promises, forgiving, etc. You make withdrawals by being disrespectful, never saying ‘you’re sorry’, not following through on commitments, holding grudges, etc.

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Think of your relationships. Take the time to determine the balance of your account and what you can proactively (anticipate) do to earn chips:

Person: __________________________________________

Types of Withdrawals (to stop): __________________________________

Types of Deposits (to start): ____________________________________

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Find a plastic poker chip to keep as a reminder. You can create “bankable” relationships with anyone you interact with. People in whom you invest chips are more likely to invest in you as well: a win-win for all.

Remember, every human being may value a different set of “chips.” We must try to supply the types of “chips” that person needs. The Golden Rule is a great rule of thumb when it comes to the basics of human kindness and respect: “Do unto others as you would like to be done unto you.” However, if your goal is to build a “chip surplus” with another person, you must find out what “chips” they value. When it comes to “chips”, humans usually try to make it equal in the end.

Here is a Relationship Account Deposit Slip. You can make copies if you’d like and after having explained the chip theory to others, give a copy to someone who has made a deposit with you as a sign of your appreciation.

*To learn more, please read “7 Habits of Highly Effective Teens” by Sean Covey