WHAT IT ISThe term “sexual violence” refers to sexual contact or behavior that occurs without explicit consent of the victim. This can include rape, attempted rape, forcing someone to perform sexual acts, or unwanted sexual touching. Even if the person was your date, boyfriend/girlfriend, spouse etc. you still need their consent. It’s important to know that sexual violence can occur without any physical contact between the perpetrator and victim. It can also include voyeurism, exhibitionism, sharing inappropriate images, and more. This type of crime is part of a larger societal issue that is influenced by sexism, racism, heterosexism, ableism, classism, and other types of oppression, and thrives in a culture where victim blaming goes unchecked.
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Anyone can be a victim of sexual assault violence of gender, race, age, religion, ability, sexual orientation, etc. While most victims are women, this kind of crime can and does happen to men as well. Regardless of the actions of the victim, what they were wearing, or where they were, they are NEVER the one to blame.
THE CRISIS
Sexual violence is shockingly present in Indiana. The National Sexual Violence Resource Center reported that 1 in 5 women will experience attempted or completed rape at some point in their lives.
Through a 2018 CDC study, it was found that Indiana leads the nation in the percentage of high school aged girls who have experienced rape at 17.3%, when the national average is 10%. When it comes to Hoosier high school boys, there are 5.2% reporting unwanted sexual intercourse.
Through a 2018 CDC study, it was found that Indiana leads the nation in the percentage of high school aged girls who have experienced rape at 17.3%, when the national average is 10%. When it comes to Hoosier high school boys, there are 5.2% reporting unwanted sexual intercourse.
CONSENT
Most times when people talk about consent, they discuss it in a way referring to sexual intercourse, but consent is so much more. Consent is needed in every aspect of any relationship. This can mean getting consent for holding hands, kissing, intercourse, or any other activity.
I’m sure you’ve heard the saying “no means no,” and while that is true, that isn’t all consent is. A more accurate statement would be “yes means yes.” Consent is an informed, freely given, active, sober “yes” that can be reversed at any time. Consent does not always have to be verbal, but we recommend getting verbal consent for every activity in order to keep you and your partner on the same page, and help you respect each other’s boundaries.
Consent can look like asking “is this ok” before any activity, or when the degree or type of activity changes. It can be a clear “yes” or an “I’m open to trying.” You can also use physical cues as consent, but remember an erection, arousal, or orgasm are involuntary bodily responses and does not necessarily mean that someone is consenting to the activity. It is always safer to get a verbal statement of consent.
Consent is NEVER assuming that someone is consenting to a sexual activity based on their clothing, location, flirting or kissing, or if they are under the influence of drugs or alcohol. Pressuring or coercing someone to consent to an activity is NOT consent, and just because they have engaged in that activity before does not mean you should assume they are willing to do it again.
If your partner ignores you or makes you feel guilty for saying “no” that may be a sign that they don’t respect you, and you may need to reevaluate the relationship. Other red flags may be making you feel like you owe them, reacting with anger when you say no, or if you have heard they have been a perpetrator before.
I’m sure you’ve heard the saying “no means no,” and while that is true, that isn’t all consent is. A more accurate statement would be “yes means yes.” Consent is an informed, freely given, active, sober “yes” that can be reversed at any time. Consent does not always have to be verbal, but we recommend getting verbal consent for every activity in order to keep you and your partner on the same page, and help you respect each other’s boundaries.
Consent can look like asking “is this ok” before any activity, or when the degree or type of activity changes. It can be a clear “yes” or an “I’m open to trying.” You can also use physical cues as consent, but remember an erection, arousal, or orgasm are involuntary bodily responses and does not necessarily mean that someone is consenting to the activity. It is always safer to get a verbal statement of consent.
Consent is NEVER assuming that someone is consenting to a sexual activity based on their clothing, location, flirting or kissing, or if they are under the influence of drugs or alcohol. Pressuring or coercing someone to consent to an activity is NOT consent, and just because they have engaged in that activity before does not mean you should assume they are willing to do it again.
If your partner ignores you or makes you feel guilty for saying “no” that may be a sign that they don’t respect you, and you may need to reevaluate the relationship. Other red flags may be making you feel like you owe them, reacting with anger when you say no, or if you have heard they have been a perpetrator before.
CHILD SEXUAL ABUSE
Any kind of sexual activity with a minor is considered child sexual abuse. A minor cannot consent to sexual activity. The crime of child sexual abuse is one that can leave a lasting impact on the victim and the victim’s family. There does not have to be the physical act of touching to be considered sexual abuse. Some forms of sexual abuse are exposing oneself, voyeurism, masturbation in the presence of a child or forcing a child to masturbate, distributing sexual materials to minors, or inappropriate calls or text messages in addition to sexual intercourse, fondling, trafficking, or any other sexual conduct with a child.
In as many as 93% of cases of child sexual abuse the perpetrator is known by the victim. Often times the abuser uses that relationship to manipulate the victim into not reporting the abuse. They may normalize the behavior, threaten a family member, or use their position of power to coerce them into silence. Also remember that the perpetrator or child sexual abuse doesn’t necessarily have to be an adult. Perpetrators can have any kind of relationship to a child such as a sibling, classmate, babysitter, coach, teacher, or family member.
There are many things that can point to child sexual abuse. Here are some things to look out for.
In as many as 93% of cases of child sexual abuse the perpetrator is known by the victim. Often times the abuser uses that relationship to manipulate the victim into not reporting the abuse. They may normalize the behavior, threaten a family member, or use their position of power to coerce them into silence. Also remember that the perpetrator or child sexual abuse doesn’t necessarily have to be an adult. Perpetrators can have any kind of relationship to a child such as a sibling, classmate, babysitter, coach, teacher, or family member.
There are many things that can point to child sexual abuse. Here are some things to look out for.
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Physical
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Behavioral
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The most important thing is to note any dramatic change in your child’s behavior. If you suspect sexual abuse, never be afraid to talk about it with your kids. Keeping an open dialogue will remind them that they can tell you anything.
If a child does disclose abuse to you, you should do your best to remain supportive and calm. Always believe your child and know that it is NEVER their fault. Your response will have a big effect on how the child heals and recovers from the abuse. Children who have a supportive adult in their lives heal more quickly. Reassure them that they are loved by you, you will be with them every step of the way, and you will do everything you can to protect them from the abuse. For more information on how to respond to disclosures of child sexual abuse, please visit the Get Help – Sexual Violence tab.
You can make a report to the Department of Child Services Hotline and local law enforcement. Every adult in Indiana is a mandated reporter of suspected child abuse or the abuse of an endangered adult.
If a child does disclose abuse to you, you should do your best to remain supportive and calm. Always believe your child and know that it is NEVER their fault. Your response will have a big effect on how the child heals and recovers from the abuse. Children who have a supportive adult in their lives heal more quickly. Reassure them that they are loved by you, you will be with them every step of the way, and you will do everything you can to protect them from the abuse. For more information on how to respond to disclosures of child sexual abuse, please visit the Get Help – Sexual Violence tab.
You can make a report to the Department of Child Services Hotline and local law enforcement. Every adult in Indiana is a mandated reporter of suspected child abuse or the abuse of an endangered adult.
CRISIS CONNECTION INC. AND ITS STAFF OFFER SERVICES WITHOUT REGARD TO OR DISCRIMINATION ON THE BASIS OF RACE, MENTAL OR PHYSICAL ABILITY, ETHNIC OR NATIONAL ORIGIN, AGE, RELIGION, GENDER, GENDER IDENTITY OR EXPRESSION, SEXUAL ORIENTATION, POLITICAL AFFILIATION OR BELIEF, MARITAL STATUS, PLACE OF RESIDENCE, OR STATUS IN REGARD TO PUBLIC ASSISTANCE OR VETERANS STATUS IN COMPLIANCE WITH ALL APPLICABLE FEDERAL, STATE, AND LOCAL LAWS.